SERMONS

Maureen Shadair

I am here to talk about what it might mean to move from gratitude to faithful action. I have been thinking all week about the scripture reading from last Sunday–about Jarus and the woman who had bled for years without relief. What incredible faith they both must have had to act, to seek out Jesus in the ways they did. I know last Sunday I had an incredible experience, and I don’t think it was just me. I believe something profound occurred in our church that day. And I am left wondering, what’s next?

This stewardship campaign began by asking us to reflect on the many things we are grateful for and the ways in which we are blessed. And that is important to do. But now, the question is what next? How do we take that sense of gratitude and move into faithful action? To start I’d like to name some of the things I am grateful for. I am grateful for my amazing son Lukas and my faithful partner Tammy. I am grateful for my health, my life, a warm house, enough food. I’m grateful to my parents who sacrificed so much to make sure their nine children were fed, clothed, and loved. I’m grateful for the lessons they taught me about hard work, perseverance, responsibility for others, and the importance of celebrating life. I’m grateful for this community at Bethany, for so many here who welcomed us and continue to sustain us—Don Jenkins who makes me want to sing, Jim and Nancy who welcomed us at the start (when we first came to Bethany Tammy and I said, they’re allies I know it! And they were!), Joanne who continually reaches out to Lukas and organizes our worship. I am grateful to live in a country with a constitution, with such an interesting rich collection of cultures. I could go on and on. There are so many reasons to be grateful. If I’ve left anyone out know that you are in my heart.

So I know why I’m grateful, but what’s next? How is growing in faith connected to seeking justice, loving kindness and walking humbly with God? I think stewardship is one of the ways I put my faith into action. It’s putting what I say I believe into practice, making a commitment to a faith community, caring for individuals and families but also sustaining the life of the church that must grow or else die. Giving part of my income or giving of myself doesn’t mean neglecting my own needs, my health, my family or my other commitments in my community. It just means that I am asked to reflect on and pray about how I can put my faith into action and then do it. Maybe some of us can give 10% and are glad to do it. Maybe others can only give a few dollars. The point is that we take the time to consider how we are blessed and how this community sustains us and then to consider how we can sustain the work and life of this community—through financial giving and the giving of time and talent.

I had the privilege of meeting both Alan and Peter Story and hearing Peter speak at Seattle University the Thursday before last Sundays’ worship at Bethany. That was an amazing experience. And, last Sunday, here at Bethany as I listened to Alan Storey speak, I had another incredible experience. I was moved—shaken might be the word—by the spirit of God. At the end of the sermon when Alan invited anyone who had felt the spirit or wanted healing to come forward, I didn’t have to think for a second about whether to go. I went up to the altar and knelt and cried—not out of sadness or fear or duty, but because it was right to do. When I hear the truth I know it. And I have to act, sometimes without knowing where it will lead me.

After that experience I didn’t have a plan. As I told Angela later, I have no idea what this means. I don’t know what I’m doing sometimes. Often I have doubts, I wonder if this faithfulness business, this following God is possible. But what I know is that throughout my life, and my journey of faith, I keep longing to hear the truth, to believe in something greater than myself.

I feel as if I have been arguing with God and struggling with this idea of faith my whole life. Many times I thought God had left me, and each time I felt the world break and my heart break with it. But what I have learned is this: Though people have failed me as I have failed them, though the church has failed me, though I have left the church, returned and left again, through all that God never left me. I have wrestled with God all my life, but I keep coming back. I keep coming back to what Jesus believed in. I see the truth of this as I look back on my life. I was raised Catholic, born again at a Mennonite Bible camp, went to a Presbyterian college, worked as a youth minister at a UCC church while participating in a Catholic lay ministry training program, attended Quaker meetings for a time. It seems obvious now—but often I’m the last to know; I can’t see what is there in front of me.

The Christian story is the one that resonates most for me. This drives me crazy! It shouldn’t be true. I’m a feminist, a very angry woman at times, a lesbian, a trouble maker. I don’t want to do what I’m told or get in line. So I don’t understand it. It doesn’t make logical sense. Alan Story said something I’m still thinking about. It’s not about believing in Jesus, making Jesus an idol; it’s about believing in the things Jesus believed in. Poof! The struggle in me ceases. Because I know can do that; I can believe in the things Jesus believed in. For such a long time I have been hesitant to commit to a Christian community, to Christianity, because I don’t believe everything I’ve been taught, Because I have been hurt and betrayed so often by the church, because I can’t check off everything I imagine is on the list of a what it means to be a “real” Christian. But those particular words Alan spoke helped me find a new way to express my belief. I believe in the things Jesus believed in: justice, kindness, humility, community. When I hear the truth, when I feel the spirit move, I know it, and I have to follow. What does make sense, I see now, is that I have always been seeking God and a community of others with whom to share this journey. If that’s true then the question is… how do I put my faith into action?

Where all this leads I can’t say. I am called to something I can’t yet see. So all I can do is trust, and follow that calling, that deep longing for God I’ve felt my whole life. I need to do that as part of a community, and Bethany, it seems, has become that community for me. I believe I am called to not just talk about my faith but to live it; not just talk about justice, but do it; not just say that I value kindness and humility but practice them. Without growing in faith my ability to act is limited, at least my ability to act in ways that are not destructive. So what do I need in order to do this? I need a community where I am welcome, for all of who I am, just as God created me to be. I need to be nourished–spiritually, emotionally and intellectually. I need to find sacred spaces, moments, interactions. And I need a community of others, who also want to grow in their faith, to hold me accountable. I need to be grateful, to acknowledge the many ways in which I am privileged. And I need to give.

Last year was the first time our family made a formal commitment to pledge a percentage of our income to the church—to any church. Ever. One of the things I discovered from that experience was that pledging actually helped me to keep my commitment to grow in faith. It encouraged me to consider how I spend my money and my time. It encouraged me to think about the needs of others and to be more accountable to myself and to this community. And each time we wrote a check—three times a month because we have to do it on paydays—it was like another moment of recommitting to follow the spirit of God moving in my life. To value what Jesus valued. To grow deeper in my own faith and share that within a larger community.

I have mentioned this to some of you before… For the first year most Sundays I came to church at Bethany I cried. I couldn’t figure out why at first. Just as last Sunday when I came and knelt at the altar with Alan and Angela and others, I couldn’t explain why. But what I think is true is that these are moments when God breaks open our hearts so that we can know, without a doubt, what is true and to whom we belong.

I’m not perfect. I wrestle with all kinds of doubts and questions. But I know the truth when I hear it. I know God’s presence when I feel it. And there is truth here. I believe that if Jesus came walking down Beacon Avenue he’d come in. And there would be a place for him here, food to eat, and others with whom to connect. Not because at Bethany we’re all set, not because we have it all figured out. But because we have made a commitment to not only give thanks for all we are grateful for in our lives but to ask over and over again… what’s next? How do we act on the truth we believe? How do we continue to deepen and cultivate our spiritual lives so we are grounded in faith as we seek justice, love kindness and walk humbly with God? That’s the question each of us has to answer for ourselves and together as a community.

Bethany is not a rich church. And I’m sort of glad for that. I think it’s one of the things that keeps us focused on what matters. On the other hand we also need resources to do our work and continue to grow. There are things we need here, and we need money to make them happen. We need faith formation for children and adults, support for justice ministries, a handle for the front door and new carpet for the church. We need to pay a living wage to our minister and office staff. We need many things to sustain the work we have begun. How will that happen?

This is a hard year to ask for money. But maybe there is never a good time. So, instead I just ask you to join me in prayerfully considering how you can put your faith into action through good stewardship. Each individual and each family has to reflect on and pray about this to find what is possible and right for them. I ask you to consider joining our family in making a commitment of money, or time and talent, or both, to sustain God’s work in this Bethany community. A friend said recently to me, “everything we need is here.” We don’t need to get lost in the past or worry about the future. Everything we need is here right now. I believe that’s true. Please consider the needs we have as a community and how you might give to support them in this new year. Making such a commitment is one way to translate your faith into action.